


When I Say My, You Say Immortal

by Gamzee_Makaraoni



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, My Immortal, Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Crack, Crack Crossover, Cutting, Dark Crack, Drinking, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Goths, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, My Immortal - Freeform, Self-Harm, Sexy Times, Smoking, Underage Drinking, Underage Smoking, awful, based on a dumb af punk lance edit, i fucking hate myself, really shitty sexy times
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-26
Updated: 2017-04-29
Packaged: 2018-10-24 09:11:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10738614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gamzee_Makaraoni/pseuds/Gamzee_Makaraoni
Summary: When you're famous across the galaxy, it's not a big surprise to find that there's a lot of rumors about you. It's also not a big surprise for people to present you with presents and offerings they made based on you.But the story Pidge found on the top secret Galra forums she hacked into at 4am?Thatwas something else entirely.





	1. Chapter 1.

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [My Immortal](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/286422) by Tara Gilebsie. 



> please kill me at gaydrienagreste on tumblr

Chapter 1.

**AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik) 2 my bf (ew not in that way) varkon, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! Merla ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! MCR ROX!**

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Hi my name is Lance Dark'ness Dementia Raven McClain and I have short dyed ebony hair with brown roots that reaches the back of my neck and is pointy like a lance (that's how I got my name) and I have dark blue eyes like the midnight sky and a lot of people tell me that I looks like Isamu Kurogane (AN: if u don't know who he is get da hell out of here!). I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. I'm in space with a bunch of aliens but my ears are round and normal. I'm also part of voltron, and I live on a castleship where I'm the blue paladin (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly blue. I love hot topic and I buy most of my clothes from there. For example today i was wearing my blue paladin armor with the skintight black flight suit and under that i was wearing my dark blue baseball tee, my ripped black skinny jeans, and combat boots. I was wearing black eyeshadow, a brow piercing, a lobe piercing, other ear piercings, and several tattoos. I was walking outside the castle. We were on a planet that was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of Galra stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

"Hey Lance!" shouted a voice. I look up. It was.... Keith Kogane!

"What's up Keith?" I asked.

"Nothing." he said shyly.

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.

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**AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me fangz!**

 


	2. Chapter 2.

**Chapter 2.**

**AN: Fangz 2 bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da chapta! BTW preps stop flaming ma story ok!**

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The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was snowing and raining again. I took off my sleep mask and drank some nunvil from a bottle I had. My sleep mask was ebony with hot pink streaks and velvet with black lace on the ends. I got out of my bed and took of my giant MCR t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a black leather jacket, a pentagram necklace, a Green Day shirt, blue short shorts, combat boots and bluefishnets on. I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, and ran my fingers through my hair in a kind of messy style.

My friend, Allura (AN: Varkon dis is u!) woke up then and grinned at me. She flipped her long waist-length snow white hair with pink streaks and opened her limpid tear-blue eyes. She put on her Marilyn Manson t-shirt with a pink mini, fishnets and pointy high-heeled boots. We put on our makeup (black lipstick brown foundation and black eyeliner.)

“OMFG, I saw you talking to Keith Kogane yesterday!” she said excitedly.

“Yeah? So?” I said, blushing.

“Do you like Keith?” she asked as we went out of the bunk rooms and into the dining hall.

“No I so fucking don’t!” I shouted.

“Yeah right!” she exclaimed. Just then, Keith walked up to me.

“Hi.” he said.

“Hi.” I replied flirtily.

“Guess what.” he said.

“What?” I asked.

“Well, Good Charlotte are having a concert on Altaea.” he told me.

“Oh. My. Fucking. God!” I screamed. I love GC. They are my favorite band, besides MCR.

“Well…. do you want to go with me?” he asked.

I gasped.


	3. Chapter 3.

**Chapter 3.**

**AN: STOP FLAMMING DA STORY PREPZ OK! odderwize fangs 2 da goffik ppl 4 da good reveiws! FANGS AGEN VARKON! oh yeah, BTW I don’t own dis or da lyrics 4 Good Chralotte.**

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On the night of the concert I put on my blue lace-up boots with high heels. Underneath them were ripped blue fishnets. Then I put on a black leather minidress with all this corset stuff on the back and front. I put on matching fishnet on my arms. I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky. I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists. I read a depressing holonovel while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some GC. I painted my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. Then I put on some black lipstick. I didn’t put on foundation because I was tan anyway. I drank some nunvil so I was ready to go to the concert.

I went outside. Keith was waiting there in front of his flying lion. He was wearing a Simple Plan t-shirt (they would play at the show too), baggy red skater pants, black nail polish and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot fo kewl galra wer it ok!).

“Hi Keith!” I said in a depressed voice.

“Hi Lance.” he said back. We walked into his flying red lion (the license plate said 666) and flew to the place with the concert. On the way we listened excitedly to Good Charlotte and Marilyn Manson. We both smoked cigarettes and drugs. When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Good Charlotte.

“You come in cold, you're covered in blood

They're all so happy you've arrived

The doctor cuts your cord, hands you to your mom

She sets you free into this life.” sang Joel (I don’t own da lyrics 2 dat song).

“Joel is so fucking hot.” I said to Keith, pointing to him as he sung, filling the club with his amazing voice.

Suddenly Keith looked sad.

“What’s wrong?” I asked as we moshed to the music. Then I caught on.

“Hey, it’s ok I don’t like him better than YOU!” I said.

“Really?” asked Keith sensitively and he put his arm around me all protective.

“Really.” I said. “Besides I don’t even know Joel and he’s going out with Hilary fucking Duff. I fucking hate that little bitch.” I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly blonde face.

The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Keith. After the concert, we drank some beer and asked Benji and Joel for their autographs and photos with them. We got GC concert tees. Keith and I crawled back into the lion, but Keith didn’t go back into the castle, instead he drove the lion into……………………… Galra territory!


	4. Chapter 4.

Chapter 4.

**AN: I sed stup flaming ok lance's name is LONCE nut mary su OK! KEITH IS SOO IN LUV wif him dat he is acting defrent! dey nu eechodder b4 ok!**

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“KEITH!” I shouted. “What the fuck do you think you are doing?”

Keith didn’t answer but he stopped the flying lion and he walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.

“What the fucking hell?” I asked angrily.

“Lance?” he asked.

“What?” I snapped.

Keith leaned in extra-close and I looked into his Galra yellow eyes (he wasn't wearing color contacts) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn’t feel mad anymore.

And then…………… suddenly just as I Keith kissed me passionately. Keith climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my boxers. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.

“Oh! Oh! Oh! ” I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my brown body became all warm. And then….

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!”

It was…………………………………………….…….Coran!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> coran i am so sorry


End file.
